I’m not normally one to rant but I’ve been on the receiving end of a few bizarre questions which first cropped up when I was pregnant, as though people seem to have lost some kind of filter that sifts out questions that aren’t really, or shouldn’t be socially acceptable. Below are a few corkers I’ve been blessed with being on the receiving end of:
‘Was it planned?’
I lost count of how many times this was the immediate response to telling someone I was with child. FYI – ‘congratulations’ is the polite response. Would you ever go up to a person in the street and ask them if their parents consciously decided to have them or if they were the result of a contraceptive failure? Of course not, because it’s irrelevant.
‘You’re huge. Are you sure you’re not having twins?’
This requires very little explanation. Just because a woman is pregnant you do not have the right to comment on her size.
‘Are you sure you ‘x’ weeks? Your bump is so small’
As above. Someone actually followed that comment to me with, ‘are you sure you’re eating enough? Think of your baby’. Erm.. yes, I eat plenty thank you. I also google everything I eat to make sure it poses no risk to my unborn baby. My midwife is happy but thank you for your unprofessional opinion.
Are you breastfeeding?
This is a tricky one because I believe breastfeeding should be the norm, and for that to be the case it has to be talked about. What I’m referring to here is a stranger asking this question with a cloud of judgement hovering overhead. It’s not their business and some mums tried desperately to breastfeed and it didn’t work out as planned. They’re devastated and the questioning just serves as a constant reminder.
‘Can your child roll / crawl / walk / talk / yet?’
My child will do these things when they are good and ready! Asking this of a child is comparable to asking a woman over the age of 25 if she’s engaged yet. Really annoying – babies don’t need pressure. And when was the last time you were asked as an adult at what age you did any of those things?
When are you having another?
Let’s just concentrate on this one for now thank you. My epistiotomy hasn’t even healed yet…
Do you have any annoying questions to add?
This post first appeared on www.meetothermums.com